How to Get Help With Funeral Expenses When Money Is Tight

Funeral costs add up fast, but there are several ways to get help with specific expenses if you know where to look and what to ask for. Most help does not cover everything, but it can reduce the bill enough to make arrangements possible.

Quick summary: Where funeral expense help usually comes from

  • County social services / human services department sometimes pays for low-cost “indigent” or “county” burials or cremations.
  • Social Security Administration may pay a small lump-sum death benefit to a surviving spouse or child.
  • State or county veterans affairs office can arrange veterans burial benefits if the person served in the military.
  • State or local assistance programs may offer emergency burial funds when the family meets low-income rules.
  • Nonprofit groups and churches sometimes help with a portion of costs, especially for children or violent deaths.
  • Crowdfunding and payment plans fill gaps when official aid is not enough.

Rules, amounts, and options vary by state, county, and situation, so you usually have to contact local offices to confirm what applies.

First decision: Are you trying to reduce the cost, get direct aid, or both?

The fastest way to move forward is to decide what kind of help you actually need and then contact the matching office.

Common goals and where to start:

  • “We have no money at all for a funeral.”
    → Call your county social services/human services department and ask about indigent burial or county cremation programs.

  • “We can pay some, but need help with part of the bill.”
    → Ask the funeral home if they will help you apply for county burial assistance or state emergency funds, and discuss direct cremation or a very simple service.

  • “They were on Social Security, SSI, or a pension.”
    → Contact your local Social Security field office and, if applicable, your state or county veterans affairs office about death benefits and burial benefits.

A practical action you can take today: call your county social services or human services department and say, “I need to ask about any burial or funeral assistance programs for low-income families; who handles that?” This usually gets you to the right worker or unit.

Where to go: The main official systems that handle funeral assistance

Most funeral expense help in the U.S. runs through a few specific offices and benefit systems:

  • County social services / human services department
    Often manages indigent burial/cremation, general assistance, or emergency burial funds for residents who have very low income or no one able to pay. They usually pay the funeral provider directly for a basic, low-cost service.

  • Social Security Administration (SSA) – local field office
    May pay a one-time lump-sum death benefit (commonly a small fixed amount) to a surviving spouse or minor child if the deceased was “insured” under Social Security. This does not cover a full funeral but can go toward costs.

  • State or county veterans affairs (VA) office
    Helps families of eligible veterans claim VA burial benefits, which can include a grave in a national cemetery, a government headstone, and sometimes a burial allowance. The office can explain what the federal VA usually covers and how to apply.

  • State or local emergency assistance program
    Some states and cities run emergency assistance or crisis response programs that sometimes include limited funeral or burial help, especially in cases of crime, disasters, or child deaths.

When searching online, look for official sites ending in .gov or state/county websites, and avoid services that ask for large “application fees” for benefits—those are common scam tactics.

Key terms to know:

  • Indigent burial / county burial — A basic cremation or burial paid for by a county or city when the family cannot afford arrangements.
  • Direct cremation — Cremation without a viewing or ceremony at the funeral home; usually the lowest-cost option.
  • Lump-sum death benefit — A small, one-time payment from Social Security to an eligible survivor.
  • Burial allowance — Money some programs (like VA or some states) may pay toward burial or funeral expenses.

What to prepare: Documents you’ll typically need

Most funeral assistance programs will ask for proof that the person died, where they lived, and what the family’s finances look like.

Documents you’ll typically need:

  • Death certificate (or a temporary proof of death letter from a hospital, coroner, or medical examiner if the certificate is not ready yet).
  • Proof of identity and relationship, such as a driver’s license or state ID for the applicant and documents showing relationship (marriage certificate, birth certificate, or other paperwork).
  • Proof of income and assets for the person responsible for arrangements and sometimes for the deceased (pay stubs, benefit award letters, bank statements, or proof of no income).

Other items that are often required:

  • Proof of residence for the deceased (lease, utility bill, ID with address), because county programs usually only help residents.
  • Itemized funeral home estimate or contract, so the agency can see what is being charged and for what services.
  • Veteran’s DD-214 or discharge papers, if applying for VA burial benefits.

If you do not have a document yet, ask the agency worker, “Can I submit the application now and give you that piece as soon as I can get it?” Some programs allow you to start and add documents later.

Step-by-step: How to apply for funeral expense assistance

1. Contact the right local office

Start with your county social services / human services department.
Ask: “Who handles burial, indigent burial, or funeral assistance applications?” and “How do I start a request?”

What to expect next: They may give you a dedicated phone number, email, or tell you to visit a walk-in office. Some counties have a specific burial unit or an “emergency assistance” desk for this.

2. Get clear on the program rules and deadlines

Ask the worker:

  • Is there an income or asset limit?
  • Does the deceased have to be a county resident?
  • Do I need to apply before I sign a funeral contract or before the burial?
  • What is the maximum amount the county typically pays and for what services?

What to expect next: The worker will usually explain that the county only pays for a basic service, often direct cremation or a low-cost burial, and that if you choose more expensive options, your family is responsible for the difference.

3. Gather and submit required documents

Once you know what they need, collect your documents:

  1. Get a copy of the death certificate or temporary proof of death from the hospital or coroner if available.
  2. Print or obtain an itemized estimate from the funeral home, clearly showing costs for each service.
  3. Gather your ID, proof of relationship, and financial documents (pay stubs, benefit letters, bank statements, or a statement that you have no income).

Ask how to submit: some offices allow in-person drop-off, others use fax, secure upload portals, or mail.
If you are unsure, a simple script: “Can you tell me the fastest way to get these documents to you so my application can be reviewed quickly?”

What to expect next: After documents are received, many offices log your request and give you a case number or at least a worker’s name. You might get a letter or phone call asking for additional information.

4. Apply for related benefits (Social Security and VA, if eligible)

In addition to local help:

  1. Call your local Social Security field office to report the death and ask if any lump-sum death benefit or ongoing survivor benefits may be available.
  2. If the deceased was a veteran, contact your state or county veterans affairs office and ask about burial benefits, headstone/marker, and burial allowance.

What to expect next:
Social Security will explain who can receive the lump-sum benefit and how to apply (often through a short interview or form). The VA-related office will usually ask for the DD-214 and guide you through scheduling a burial in a national cemetery or claiming allowances, if applicable.

5. Final review, decision, and payment process

After your county or state program reviews your request, you typically receive:

  • A notice of approval or denial, sometimes with a specific dollar amount they are willing to pay.
  • Instructions about what the funeral home must submit (for example, an invoice on letterhead or a completed vendor form).

Most government programs pay the funeral provider directly, not the family.
If the approved amount is lower than the funeral home’s charges, you’ll need to negotiate the services or arrange how your family will cover the difference.

Real-world friction to watch for

Common snags (and quick fixes)

  • You already signed a high-cost funeral contract. Some programs only help if you arrange a basic, low-cost service and apply before finalizing. Ask the funeral director, “Can we revise this to a basic package that works with county assistance guidelines?”
  • No death certificate yet. Ask the social worker or funeral home if they can accept a hospital or coroner letter first, with the certificate to follow; some will start the file while you wait.
  • You can’t reach the correct office. Call the main county government or city hall switchboard and say, “I’m trying to reach the office that handles indigent or county burials; which department is that?” Then write down the direct number for follow-ups.

Additional legitimate help options

If official assistance is limited or denied, there are still ways to reduce costs or find smaller amounts of help:

  • Negotiate with the funeral home. Ask for an itemized list, then say, “Can you show me the lowest-cost option that still meets the legal requirements?” Consider direct cremation with a separate memorial service at home or a church.

  • Ask about payment plans or delayed billing. Some funeral homes allow payment over time if they know you are applying for benefits or waiting on life insurance or Social Security payments.

  • Contact local nonprofits, churches, or community groups. Many faith communities and service organizations have small benevolence funds for urgent needs; some specifically assist with funerals, especially for children or victims of violence.

  • Check crime victim compensation programs if the death resulted from a crime. State victim compensation offices sometimes help with funeral costs when law enforcement confirms eligibility.

  • Use crowdfunding carefully. Online fundraising can help, but be cautious of people offering to “manage” funds for you; whenever possible, have donations sent directly to the funeral home or to an account in your control.

Because money and personal information are involved, be cautious of anyone who:

  • Demands large “processing fees” to get benefits.
  • Guarantees approval or “priority” if you pay them.
  • Asks you to send your Social Security number or ID images through unsecured email or social media.

To move forward today, identify your county social services/human services department, call, and ask how to apply for burial or funeral assistance, then start gathering your death certificate, ID, proof of relationship, and proof of income so you are ready when they tell you how to submit.

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